Despite what we were led to believe in school many couples will struggle to fall pregnant (even so much as looking at a penis could make you pregnant according to my school)! If you’ve been trying to conceive for a while, naturally you might start to consider 'Am I doing something wrong?'
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So here are 5 common ‘mistakes’ I see couples making when trying to conceive.
1. Not knowing when you’re ovulating
Understanding your cycle, and your ovulation is very essential. Firstly making sure you are ovulating, knowing the signs to look for and how to track your cycle to predict future ovulations will give you a good idea of your fertile windows. While sperm can last 3-5 days, an egg once released will only survive 24 hours, making the fertility window quite small, in fact, in each cycle there is only 6 days where you could fall pregnant.
Also just want to point out that again, unlike what we learnt in biology while a 28-day cycle and 14-day ovulation may be common for some, it definitely isn’t for many- and that’s also perfectly normal and healthy. We like to see a cycle between 23-35 days and ovulation to be around 14 days before your next period (or 10-14 days after your period). For this reason, it’s better to track ovulation using by checking your basal body temperature each morning or by getting to know your cervical mucus rather than using an app. After a couple of months of tracking you should be able to start predicting when your next ovulation date will be.
2. Overlooking the importance of diet and lifestyle
While many factors in your fertility story are out of your control, such as; age, genetics, medical history, diet and lifestyle isn’t. What's more is diet and lifestyle is THE biggest thing you can adapt to improve your fertility health. We all know the importance diet has on our overall health and our fertility health is no different. In fact, just 5 specific dietary changes can boost your fertility by up to 69%.
It’s easy to forget about the role of nutrition, in one way it seems too simple just to fix your diet and in another, it seems like too much effort. So many people search for the magic bullet or the ‘number one thing to eat to improve fertility’ and -sorry to burst your bubble- but there’s no single thing!
Contrary to what you may have read, adopting a ‘fertility diet' doesn’t have to be strict or complex, if you struggle to wade through all the information (and don't worry, you’re not alone- it can be so easy to get lost it in all) and need help developing strategies to help the healthy habits stick, I suggest reaching out. Getting on top of your nutrition and health will literally benefit you for the rest of your life!
3. Not factoring in the male partner's health
For centuries, infertility issues have been pinned as a woman's issue, and while science has refuted this, many women tend to take on the majority of preconception planning. The male partner’s health can either be forgotten or left until last to investigate.
Yet the reality is, sperm health is declining at a rapid rate and it is estimated 30% of infertility cases are due to the male factor.
On the plus side (if there is one) sperm health can be completely transformed in a couple of months, given it is so susceptible to diet and lifestyle. Sperm analysis is also very simple, non-invasive and gives you an indication of the specific parameter you need to work on!
4. Not reaching out for help
Fertility struggles can be incredibly isolating, and definitely not spoken about as much as they should be. You’re not silly for wanting to reach out to someone, asking for a second opinion, or wanting to know your options, AND you don’t have to wait the recommended 6 or 12 months (depending on age) before requesting standard blood tests.
If you suspect an underlying issue, go with your gut, get some routine checks, talk to a professional and develop a plan. If there is something else at play, such as a hormone imbalance, or a micronutrient deficiency, you want this time to correct it!
There are so many amazing professionals who are on your side and want to help you, find the people you gel with a create a preconception team of professionals. A good GP/doctor/ gynaecologist, a psychologist, an acupuncturist and a fertility nutritionist (that’s me!) is invaluable!
5. Comparing your journey to others
It’s natural to seek comfort and support by reaching out and comparing yourself to others in a similar situation. While it can feel reassuring to know others are enduring similar emotions the impact of comparing stories can be huge. Everyone’s fertility story is unique to them, and all of them are valid.
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It’s important during this time to protect your mental and emotional well-being. I encourage you to regularly check in with yourself and be honest about your feeling. Speak to close your partner or close friends about how you’re feeling, and reach out to a professional if it feels like it’s becoming too much!
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